GQ Does Pussy Riot… Shadows of Mandela, Lenin Shimmer


If the Russian judiciary keeps up their bumbling of the Pussy Riot case, they’ll make Pussy Riot into a kind of Mandela upon their release…

I’m kinda having a turnaround on the whole Pussy Riot saga over in Mother Russia. Not that I’m losing my Orthodox faith (hanging on as only a knave of sinners can hang on). Nor that I’m siding with those blasphemous punk sluts (I still hold that a reality show of babushkas flogging them in Red Square in the public view showed on a continuous loop for one full church calendar year would be the most just of all acts of penitence for their atrocity in the cathedral last February). But I am beginning to come around to the belief that the Russian judicial wing really muffed the kick on this entire issue with each development. And this latest round of tricks really shows how shaky its hand is in its handling of the affair.

GQ just published its November issue, with an exclusive prison interview with the girls held in prison. Recall they were locked up for their February assault on the Christ the Savior Cathedral in Moscow. I’ve written about this several times before and I won’t waste too much time rehashing the whole story, but let’s just say that the act itself was about as offensive to an Orthodox Christian as walking into the Auschwitz Museum in Poland and singing “Deutschland uber alles” would be to someone of the Jewish faith. Or, perhaps, building a Wahhabi mosque somewhere near Ground Zero in New York.

Nah, Lenin works better as an analogy for Pussy Riot. He was more their type. Back from exile the’ll be ready to roll over the Kremlin.

Three members of the “collective” were convicted of hooliganism and sentenced to two years in a medium security prison. The GQ story, while I completely disagree with its politics, is an excellent interview by journalistic standards. And a great act of penetration I might add, slut pun notwithstanding. The magazine boasts it did the interview by “slipping” the questions in through Pussy Riot’s lawyers. Apparently, not only did it fool the authorities in getting the questions through, but the answers to two of the three questions slid through the dopey prison guards. End result: a pretty expansive Q&A session with the world’s most fashionable (and slutty) punk exiles.

The problem is, from the desecration of the cathedral on to this point, the Russian government, from the judiciary to Putin to Medvedev has been doing little to deflect attention away from the case. The band’s plight — first its arrest, then its jail time awaiting trial, then its conviction, and then its sentencing and now its time in prison, has attracted copious worldwide attention, and galvanized abundant anti-Russian support, against Putin, against the Church, against anyone there that has kind of institutional or moral authority.

For instance, the hate group Femen has been chainsawing crosses down and paying “bounties” for others to do the same. Copycats across Russia have been busy defacing Russian churches. Meanwhile, the Russian judiciary, by locking up Pussy Riot has emboldened opposition to it and radicalized hatred of the Orthodox Church, which has for the two decades enjoyed a huge revival in post-communist Russia. It’s as if their moves have loosed the ghosts Lenin, Stalin, Trotsky, and the whole cabal of rabid commie church-haters upon the  land again.

One way to deal with the crisis would be to let the girls out now and deal with the aftermath as coolly as possible. (Another way to handle such crises in the future would be to behead the girls, stage anti-western riots daily, burn American flags for insulting Orthodoxy, and then western apologies for Russophobia would come pouring in. That simple. But we don’t have to wax hysterical over such black humor, don’t we?)

On a serious note, the Russian Orthodox Church now permits its own clergy to run for political office. Not sure how I feel about that yet, but at least we know that the Church, the State, and the country in general don’t give a hoot about what anyone else in the world thinks. And kudos for that…

Not ironically, the Church itself has asked several times for that judicial system to have mercy on those grrls, although a unified call for their early release from prison has not quite been uttered. Many church members have voiced a personal desire for immediate clemency for the three, but not the entire hierarchy. In fact, Prime Minister Dmitri Medvedev has called for their release for time served, yet his plea has fallen on deaf ears. Instead, the bumbling Russian judiciary allows western press access to the girls by hook or by crook, as if to strengthen Pussy Riot’s already strong, unfeminine hands. More Stings, more Madonnas, more Paul McCartneys, more James Camerons, more publicity, more empowerment to the exile.

The girls are apparently reading Solzhenitsyn in their cells. Next thing you know, Pussy Riot will become Russian Mandelas, ready to topple Putin and United Russia from power when they get let out. Russia will be run by a triumvirate of Pussy Power…Imagine that! (I bet there are a few Russians that actually could.) Actually, those slutty chicks wouldn’t be like Mandela at all. They would more resemble Lenin, coming out of the Zurich exile in 1917 to try to kill Christ again in Mother Russia.

Crazy thoughts, for bizarro days. But they fit. They really do.

Advertisements

About Pete Mladineo


One response to “GQ Does Pussy Riot… Shadows of Mandela, Lenin Shimmer

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: